Farewell to Fall

It’s December, but I’m not quite ready to let go of November yet. Perhaps the reason is a week-long trip our family took to San Antonio for the National Bible Bee the week before Thanksgiving; we returned home Monday the 21st and had to restock the fridge and pantry, do mountains of laundry, and figure out what we were cooking for the Big Meal. We hosted my parents, but honestly, it was a simple, quiet affair. I didn’t have time or energy for the fun extras I usually enjoy doing. My birthday is November 22, and I have always loved autumn. A favorite family tradition is adding to our “Blessing Tree,” and I cherish the memories of little hands taping colorful paper leaves to the branches and proclaiming gratefulness for everything from pizza and stuffed animals to family and salvation in Jesus Christ.

One of the most normal shots of everyone;
unfortunately, Rhema is not looking, but at least
there are no bunny ears or crossed eyes...oh, wait.
Tobin does have his eyes crossed. Sigh.

This year we didn’t even set up the blessing tree. Our table was bare of adornment—we chose to do a buffet line. There was no need for place cards, so we didn’t bother. We used our special Blue Willow plates and went around the table several times saying what we were thankful for (no one was allowed to repeat anything already mentioned), but somehow it just seemed…incomplete. Somewhat disappointing, maybe even a bit hollow.

This isn’t fair to my amazing family. It was truly a joy to spend a few days with my parents. The last time we had celebrated Thanksgiving together was in 2009! And I had willing helpers in meal preparation (and more or less willing helpers in clean-up, lol). The leftovers meant I didn’t have to cook for a few days afterward, but a spell of possible salmonella put a huge damper on the day after Thanksgiving as my poor hubby took to his bed with stomach pains. (Thank the good Lord for Young Living’s DiGize essential oil blend!)

We all thoroughly enjoyed the turkey,
which we roasted in a paper bag, but: lesson learned,
wash those ARMS, not just hands,
after slathering butter and herbs all over the bird!

Facebook now features a “See Your Memories” option, and I enjoy going back in time and seeing posts and photos from years past. There were several years when I joined with many others in posting something each day I felt thankful for. That fad seemed to be passé this year—maybe the political climate kept our attention elsewhere at the beginning of November? Or maybe folks in my Facebook feed, like me, simply decided not to do the daily posts. I certainly saw many beautiful sentiments of gratefulness: I enjoyed scrolling through photos of families gathered around tables, glimpses of culinary delights, and Bible verses proclaiming God’s goodness.

But—this year I have a new addition to my Facebook feed. Posts to the trisomy parents support group show up randomly as I’m scrolling, and I ended Thanksgiving evening in tears over a family who learned their baby boy would be stillborn…doctors said they could have Thanksgiving with their loved ones before going to the hospital for an induction. And this wasn’t the only loss the trisomy community experienced during the holiday week.

So…with the turn of the calendar page to December, this morning I am feeling reflective and somewhat melancholy. And yet—truly—my heart overflows with Thanksgiving! This morning’s Bible reading for my husband and me included a couple of chapters from Nehemiah, and I am reminded that in the midst of mourning—indeed, in the midst of any circumstances—the JOY of the Lord is our STRENGTH. And so, I write this as a final farewell to November 2016 and the first Thanksgiving our family has experienced with a little person named Verity in our lives.

Here is my list of 30 reasons I am thankful during this unique time. In no particular order…I am thankful for:

1. The fact that Verity is alive and kicking—this little girl is full of LIFE and certainly rivals her siblings in the gymnastics department!
2. Advance notice of the Trisomy 18 diagnosis. Many families have no idea until after their little ones arrive. I am grateful God is allowing us this time of preparation.
3. An incredibly supportive community of family and friends. I have never felt so loved and encouraged as I have over the past couple of months.
4. A tenderhearted, like-minded husband. Truly, I could not be on this journey of life, love, and parenthood without my Ted, a man who not only holds me when I’m falling apart but is able and willing to cry along with me.
5. Children who already treasure their unborn sister, speaking words of love and laughter to her through my expanding belly.
6. The power and presence of God: there are days when I am amazed at what we are accomplishing in our homeschool routine, when I have joy and peace abounding for no other reason BUT GOD.
7. The tender mercies of my Lord and Savior: there are days when I just “can’t even.” When I don’t shower and stay in my bathrobe and let the kids have whatever they find in the pantry to eat. When the best I can do is hang on for dear life until Ted gets home from work. And yet God’s power is made perfect as I wallow in weakness.
8. The wonders of technology—ultrasounds that allow us to see Verity and keep tabs on her development.
9. Verity’s wonderfully formed little body, knit together by a loving Creator.
10. Coffee, made Italian-style by my husband every morning. It tastes delicious and never fails to make Verity dance.
11. Medical professionals who embrace life no matter the diagnosis, and…
12. Resources and encouragement beyond the medical professionals who don’t.
13. New friends and connections I’ve made just in the last 2 months because of this journey we are on.
14. Opportunities to speak life and truth to a hurting world.
15. Opportunities to speak life and truth to our children, who are forming their own worldview.
16. My new Instant Pot. (Now to find/make time to figure out how to use it so it can bless my family in the days to come…)
17. A beautifully consistent heartbeat, heard on the monitor and seen on the ultrasound screen during each of Verity’s checkups so far.
18. Verity’s beautiful little profile and healthy heart.
19. Essential oils—not only are they keeping me and my family healthier than ever, but I also love purposefully praying and anointing my belly with oils like Frankincense and Lavender or blends such as Joy, Abundance, or Stress Away.
20. The mental and emotional support I get each day from our oils…this is worth a separate mention, especially since a year ago I was struggling with some post-partum issues.
21. The TRUTH of God’s Word, which reminds me that God’s thoughts and ways are higher than mine, and His purposes will prevail.
22. The hope of eternity. Our struggles here are temporary and will fade away.
23. My husband’s job that gives us health care coverage—knowing we do not have to make medical decisions based on whether or not we can afford them is a huge burden off our shoulders.
24. A measure of normalcy in our lives—at least for now. Routine is good.
25. A pretty “normal” pregnancy. Other than the T18 diagnosis, nothing about this pregnancy is really any different from my others, as far as my own physical health.
26. Central air and heating. After living in Italy for 3 years and feeling hot in the summertime and freezing cold during the winter…well, I’m grateful.
27. Our church. Everywhere we’ve been, God has put us in a community of believers who become our family. We know God placed us here “for such a time as this.”
28. Peace. My heart is at peace, even though I yearn for insight into the future.
29. Laughter. It really is “good like a medicine,” as Proverbs says. My husband and my kids make me laugh on a daily basis, and I am grateful!
30. The truth of Hebrews 13:5 and 8, which reminds me that God will never leave or forsake us and that Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever.